The older I get the more life is fascinating to me. I’ve lived 4 (ish) decades and am amazed at the twists and turns that life will take place in your life. Our lives are stories that being written out.
It seems that so many know the relationship that my siblings and I share. I just wanted to share what’s on my heart and to say that a new chapter is being written.
Growing up, my sisters and I were pretty typical. I have a scar on my thumb from scissors that were rudely ripped from my grasp. I was a thug and would beat down my sisters for the can of Aqua Net hairspray. Punching Jenny in the nose and begging for forgiveness when it bled, with the plea: “PLEASE don’t tell dad!!!” She told dad. lol We weren’t super close at all.
Mike and Jenny (my brother in law and sister) got born again….note the beginning of change for our family. Then, I got born again, then my mom, my dad and sister. We all started serving Christ together. That’s when the story takes an important and life altering direction.
Our mom got sick, and died. Choices. Every character in a story has choices to make when a twist in the story comes, right? Mom was believing for healing, right? We were standing with her. What happened? There were a couple of choices: This faith stuff doesn’t work and walk away from our Christ or embrace Christ tighter and know that this “faith stuff does work” and keep plugging on. We chose Christ and His Word and we leaned not unto our own understanding. We embraced the God of the universe and the one Who loves us. Does that mean it was easy? No, it wasn’t. It was awful. However, looking back and I see the ties that God started to use to draw the 3 “Beard girls” together. Causing us to lean a little more on each other.
Life moved on, other changes happened….then, dad got sick, and he died. I remember walking through those days of his journey feeling ….just….I don’t know..I just felt like a kid wandering aimlessly lost. So many things went on emotionally and mentally. The girls and I would joke that we were like ducks. One day Jessica would be the strong one and Jenny and I would follow behind. There was one moment after dad died where is was so clear what God was doing in us. Our bond was unbreakable. We would run to the border (a.k.a. grandma’s) and reconnect with the family that was separate from everything going on.
I can see through those years after dad died that we needed that time of bonding. God used these past years to heal us, grow us, teach us. Its been some pretty fantastic years. We have had so much fun living a few miles apart. They had me running…now I’m running and they are not! (Slackers) It was an appointed time in our lives where God worked on our hearts. However, now it’s time for a new chapter. I’ve noticed that while the bond between us is there, our NEED for each other hadn’t been as strong. When all that went on with mom and dad, we NEEDED each other.
This next chapter is a little bittersweet, yet very exciting. Jennifer and her husband have been called to Newburgh to help with a church. She is only 3 hours away, so I’ll see her as often as our schedule allows. Jessica and her husband are moving to Florida. This is the trip we are taking tomorrow. While this hurts because it will be several months before I see her and her family, I know they are doing what God has prepared for them as well.
So, where does that leave me? Many have asked, ‘are you leaving too?’ My answer of course is no. lol I have my husband and girls, my brother & his wife and kids that still live around here. I have my nieces that are close enough to see, my nephew Cody and his wife. I have my best friend and her family. I have people that love me around. But I sense in my spirit that now is my time to soar. I believe that this moment in time was destined to happen when it has. I believe that I’m stepping into new freedom…
Anyway, this is what is on my heart and I wanted to get it out of the way before we leave.